If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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