My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I am puke
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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