That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize