the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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