I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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