Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Randomize
