yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
