But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
