hotel room ftw
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I understand Curling. That high.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Randomize
