Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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