Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
