We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I think your dad took our porno
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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