Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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