Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
