Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
