He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Semen is not good for contacts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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