literally had 100 drinks last night.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
