It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
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