You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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