Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Randomize
