I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
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Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my poor anus
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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