So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Randomize
