she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
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At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
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i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
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