You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize