If that was your dad, he is hot
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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