her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
