Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
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