Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Randomize
