Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
