hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Randomize
