had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize