I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.