I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
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Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
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We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.