just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize
