You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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