Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
This is my gift to your gina
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Randomize
