You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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