I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Randomize
