i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
