I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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