were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
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im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
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Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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