It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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