I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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