i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
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