i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
