I murdered the dance floor call the cops
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you just send me my own nude
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
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