Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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