Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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