You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Randomize
