Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
