haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
COCAINE IS GR8
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
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