What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
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