shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
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My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
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i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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